What Am I Afraid Of

I've been following you once more
never even knocked on your front door
I watched you like a thousand times before
now I see you crying on the porch
can't describe the feeling this sight conveyed
somewhere between sorrow and dismay
but then familiar fears came up and they
made me turn my head and walk away

these fears keep me locked
what am I afraid of?
what is it that makes me think
I am safe inside myself?

I lie in my bed and I can't ignore
the thought of your tears dropping on the floor
though I don't know the reason you cried out for
I should have gone to soothe you at the door
I met you on the street the other day
I just felt ashamed and looked away
because familiar fears came up and they
made me turn my head and walk away

these fears keep me locked
what am I afraid of?
what is it that makes me think
I am safe inside myself?